Making a comeback

Six weeks...that is how long I was sick.  I thought I would never feel "normal" again.  I lost my voice three different times and haven't fully gained it back....but I am on the mend.

In that time, I took a break from blogging and I am sorry to have left you hanging...but there comes a time when you have to choose where to spend your energy and just getting out bed took more energy than I had most days.

But through these past weeks, God has taught me an important lesson on the subject of rest. I don't necessarily mean rest as in sleeping in on a Saturday -- although, that is awesome. The rest I mean is that like the Psalmist describes in the 23rd Psalm.

"He makes me lie down in green pastures.  He restores my soul..."

The word picture painted for the reader is of a tranquil meadow along side a crystal clear brook. I could pitch a hammock and camp out there all day.  You know the place.... time comes to a stop, there are no demands, no pressures, no "have to's".... no cell phone reception, no job, no boss, no housework.

But the other things this peaceful spot lacks is fear, chaos, noise, uncertainty, hurried pace, worry....these do not exist in the green pastures and still waters. 

There are times in my life when I run and run and run and run... when it feels like I am on a treadmill going warp speed and my legs just can't keep up. That is when something grabs me and forces me to slow down -- something like my six week battle to get better.

Scratching things off the to-do list is hard and it can become complicated to choose what stays and what goes when everything on your list is good. I can't say specifically what was knocked off my list, but I can tell you that I learned how to view my list... instead of it being a list of "have to's"... I turned it into a list of "get to's". 

The difference is with a "have to" you remove the personal choice and you pack on the obligation. You also pile on the guilt if you can't keep up....at least I do...maybe I am the only one out there that runs in this cycle.

But when something becomes a "get to" it is on my list because I chose it.  It can easily come off the list if I want or become rescheduled....the choice is mine. That allows me to be in control of my time, my activities and my self.

So, yes.... blogs will continue to come because I am choosing to spend time each week expending some energy in this area. That may mean saying "no" to other things...but again it's a choice and I choose  green pastures and still waters.